What's God's Will for My Family?

This question will never lose its relevance, as every generation of families must wrestle with it over and over again. Answering it isn’t simple.

While not everyone is a parent, everyone is somehow linked and connected to one. Discovering the calling of the family is unique because it focuses on a group of linked and connected people rather than the individual. Isn’t it interesting that we find the Bible Jesus calling groups of people mainly. From the first family, Adam and Eve to Abraham and his family to the people of Israel and skipping to the New testament, the disciples themselves. God loves to involve groups of people, not just individuals. Family was His idea, not ours. And to explore the calling of the family is to deeply touch something that matters much to God Himself.

Called to Freedom in the Family

The first calling is God’s invitation to move from being disconnected to connected to Him. Another way to say it is from spiritual death to spiritual life. This move is nothing short of a miracle. When we were lost in sin, God called us into new life through union with Christ.

Exodus 6:6 says:

"Say therefore to the people of Israel, ‘I am the Lord, and I will bring you out from under the burdens of the Egyptians, and I will deliver you from slavery to them, and I will redeem you with an outstretched arm and with great acts of judgment."

Deliverance from bondage is a beautiful, extraordinary experience that could have only been possible by the hand of the Lord. Christ was our deliverance from sin. Paul describes in 1 Corinthians 1:22–24:

“For Jews demand signs and Greeks seek wisdom, but we preach Christ crucified, a stumbling block to Jews and folly to Gentiles, but to those who are called, both Jews and Greeks, Christ the power of God and the wisdom of God.”

Millions hear the general call of the gospel, but not all respond in faith. Paul shows us that while many see the gospel as foolishness or a stumbling block, others experience an inward, divine call that transforms their hearts. They recognize Christ crucified as the wisdom and power of God and embrace Him as Savior.

In Jesus' own words when asked 'what is the greatest commandment' in Matthew 22:36 Jesus said, "You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment."

Loving God is the most fulfilling thing we can do as human beings. This calling is foundational for families. Parents, it’s through this life-giving call that we are equipped to lead our households in faith. We were once dead in sin, but God’s sovereign call awakened us to life in Christ. As Christians, this is the first and most critical step in aligning our family with God’s will—embracing the saving work of Christ and guiding our loved ones toward Him.

May this truth remind us daily to pray, “God, don’t let me make choices for my family that would ruin our lives. Help us live fully in the power of Your call.”

Called to Covenant Faithfulness in the Family

There’s also a unique and sacred calling that comes with entering into lifelong covenants before God. Chief among these is the covenant of marriage—a relationship designed by God and patterned after Christ’s covenant with the Church, as described in Ephesians 5. I officiate several weddings a year. The Bible is rich with verses about marriage that you can’t them all in the ceremony. I always however end with one that emphasizes when a man and woman enter into this covenant, they are joined together by God in a union so profound we are instructed not to tamper with it. As Jesus said in Mark 10:9, “What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”

This calling is distinct and unchanging. Unlike the flexibility of changing careers, jobs, homes or cars, the covenant of marriage is a lifelong commitment: “till death do us part.” This sacred bond is not just about companionship but reflects the steadfast, sacrificial love Christ has for His people. It is through this covenant that families are built, nurtured, and guided in God’s will.

For parents, this covenant serves as the foundation of family life, shaping how we model faithfulness, forgiveness, and unconditional love for our children. It’s a constant reminder that our commitment to one another is not merely human but deeply spiritual, rooted in God’s design for flourishing families.

Called to a Process in the Family

Your family’s calling involves a process—God’s unfolding work of leading His children into positions of fruitful service. Maturing in the Lord is a lifelong journey, not a one-time event. It’s a process of growth that unfolds as we walk with Christ, guided by His Word, empowered by the Holy Spirit, and shaped by His grace. Just as a seed grows into a tree over time, so too does our faith and character develop through seasons of learning, refining, and trusting in God.

Growth Takes Time

Spiritual maturity doesn’t happen overnight. It’s like planting a garden—you nurture the soil, water the seeds, and patiently wait as God gives the increase. In the same way, God works in us over time to grow the fruits of the Spirit—love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control (Galatians 5:22-23). Each moment of obedience and each step of faith adds to our maturity.

Learning Through Challenges

The journey of maturing in the Lord often involves trials and challenges. James 1:2-4 reminds us that the testing of our faith produces perseverance, which leads to spiritual completeness. These seasons teach us to depend on God, deepen our trust in Him, and refine our character to reflect Christ more fully.

This should firstly take place in the home. What place is better than the spaces where we eat meals, rest and spend most of our time in. It can also occur in the church, the workplace, and it often involves discerning where God wants us next. While some callings may last a lifetime, others might be for a season, such as raising young children, serving in a specific ministry, or pursuing a particular career path.

As parents, this type of calling teaches us to be attentive to how God is moving in our lives and our family’s lives. It requires us to listen, pray, and follow His guidance as we navigate the changing seasons of family life. As we discern what we are responsible for at any given time.

But, how do we know where God is leading us? Especially when it comes to our roles as parents, spouses, and servants in the broader world? To discern this, here are a few ways to focus on God’s leading:

Prayer – Begin by seeking God’s wisdom and clarity through prayer, both individually and as a family.
Scripture – Ground your decisions in biblical truth, allowing God’s Word to illuminate your path.
Wise Counsel – Seek advice from trusted mentors, spiritual leaders, or family members who know your heart and share your values.
Gifts and Passions – Reflect on the unique talents and desires God has placed in you and your family.
Opportunities – Pay attention to doors God is opening or closing in your circumstances.
Inner Conviction – Be sensitive to the Holy Spirit’s prompting, giving you peace and direction.

In family life, these steps are not just about finding our individual callings but also about helping each family member discern how God is leading them. By modeling this process, we equip our children to seek and follow God’s will in their own lives.

Let us as families, faithfully embrace our call to covenant love and remain attentive to God’s ongoing work as He shapes us for His purposes.

Called to Seek Good as a Family

God calls families to seek what is good, true, and honoring to Him in every area of life. Through His Word, He gives us a worldview with Christ at the center, teaching us to discern between what is good and what is harmful. This applies not only to our personal choices but also to the paths we encourage our children to follow.

As a family, we are called to reject paths that are evil, hurtful, or unhelpful to others. Not every opportunity is aligned with a Christ-centered life. This is a crucial lesson to instill in our children—that our choices, whether about work, relationships, or daily actions, must reflect God’s goodness and truth.

When we, as a family, face decisions that aren’t crystal clear, we should seek God’s wisdom together, asking questions like:

Does this family choice reflect Christ’s love?
Will this path for my family allow us to serve others faithfully?
Does it help us as a family contribute to God’s purposes in the world?

By aligning our family with what is good, we model for our children how to live with integrity and purpose.

Respond to the Need Together

God also calls families to lean into the needs of others rather than focusing solely on our own comfort or security. As Jesus commanded, “ And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself.” (Matthew 22:39). This isn’t just an individual call—it’s a family mission.

As parents, we can help our children recognize the needs around them and equip them to respond with compassion and action. Whether it’s serving in the church, helping a neighbor, or contributing to a cause, families are uniquely positioned to meet needs together.

Ask as a family:

What needs do we see in our community or church?
How can we, as a family, use our time, talents, and resources to help?

By running toward need, we show our children that true joy comes not from selfish gain but from selfless love.

Embrace What Your Family Loves

God has uniquely gifted each family member with different talents, skills, and inclinations. As Paul writes in Romans 12:6–8, God’s gifts are diverse, and they are meant for both building up the church and serving in everyday life. Families thrive when they recognize and celebrate these differences, helping each member discover their God-given strengths.

Encourage your children to explore their gifts:

Talents – What activities or tasks come naturally to them?
Passions – What excites them or stirs their heart for God’s work?

However, balance is key. While it’s important to nurture these gifts, we must also teach our children that life sometimes calls us to step outside of our comfort zones. Not every task will feel perfectly suited to our abilities, but some of the greatest growth happens when we embrace challenges and serve where we’re needed most.

As a family, reflect on how God has made each of you unique and how your collective strengths can be used for His glory. In a world with many choices, this awareness helps us discern God’s calling, whether it’s for a season or a lifetime.

Living the Call as a Family

By pursuing good, running toward need, and embracing the gifts God has given us, families can live out their calling in a way that glorifies God and blesses others. Together, we reflect Christ’s love, meet real needs, and discover the joy of walking in His will. May your family always seek His guidance and find His purpose in every season of life.

Be Quick to Listen as a Family

God calls families to value wise counsel and seek guidance together. Proverbs 1:5 reminds us, “Let the wise hear and increase in learning, and the one who understands obtain guidance” As a family, we should cultivate a culture of listening—listening to one another, to trusted mentors, and most importantly, to God’s Word.

Encourage your family to:

Seek advice together – When facing big decisions, involve your spouse and children, showing them the importance of seeking counsel from those with wisdom and godly insight.
Model humility – Let your children see you acknowledge that you don’t have all the answers and are willing to learn from others.
Build a community of godly wisdom – Surround your family with people who share your values and can speak truth into your lives.

By listening well, families grow in unity, wisdom, and trust in God’s guidance.

Fall to Your Knees Together

Prayer is one of the greatest tools God has given families to discern His will. James 1:5 encourages us: “If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him.”

As a family, make prayer a central part of decision-making:

Pray together- aloud – Gather as a family to seek God’s guidance for decisions, big or small.
Pray regularly – Teach your children the value of daily prayer, reminding them that God delights in their trust and dependence.
Pray full of faith – Encourage your family to pray specifically and expectantly, trusting God to provide clarity and direction.

Model this in your home by praying openly: “Lord, help us make choices that honor You. Don’t let us waste the gifts or time You’ve given us. Lead us in Your perfect will.”

Consider Your Family's Holy Interests

God works in our hearts to align our Interests with His will, especially when we are walking closely with Him. As Paul said in 2 Corinthians 5:17, “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.” When our family is focused on holiness—through prayer, Scripture, worship, and service—our interests often reflect God’s leading.

Teach your family to recognize these signs of holy interests:

Repeated Interests – Encourage your children to pay attention to interests and callings that consistently return over time, rather than fleeting whims.
Strong Interests – Help your family notice passions and interests that stir deeply and motivate them to action.
Holy Interests – Explain that interests formed during times of sin or spiritual distance are unreliable. Instead, focus on those cultivated during moments of closeness with God.

As a family, ask questions like:

What opportunities excite us and feel aligned with God’s Word?
How can we use these passions to serve others and glorify God?

By listening to these holy interests, your family can better discern where God is leading you, whether in ministry, relationships, or daily life.

Living Out God’s Will as a Family

Together, by being quick to listen, faithful in prayer, and attentive to holy interests, your family can walk in God’s will with confidence. Teach your children that God’s ultimate desire for your family is holiness, and as you seek that together, He will provide clarity and direction for every step of your journey.

As parents, you have a unique and beautiful calling to lead your family in the purposes God has designed for you. Living in that calling is not just about fulfilling a duty—it’s about stepping into a life that is deeply fulfilling, transformative, and rich with eternal significance.

When you embrace this calling, you are not just guiding your children; you are creating a home where God’s love and truth flourish. You get to witness firsthand the incredible growth God is working in your children—their developing faith, their unique gifts, and the character He is shaping within them. It’s like having a front-row seat to a masterpiece in progress, crafted by the hands of the Creator. Not only will you see your children grow in ways that reflect God’s plan for their lives, but you’ll also find your own hearts stretched and filled in the process. Walking in God’s calling as parents brings a profound joy and fulfillment that cannot be matched by anything else. It strengthens your faith, deepens your marriage, and allows you to experience God’s faithfulness in real, tangible ways.

Your family’s journey in God’s calling won’t be perfect, but it will be worth it. By living intentionally and relying on His grace, you’ll create a legacy of faith and love that will echo through generations. Embrace this calling, and let God lead you into the fullness of life He has prepared for your family.

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